Cass And Gabe's Ultimate Prank War
by RandomSpeedReader
Summary: Cass needs help. Who else will he turn to but the Winchester brothers? The three of them team up against the ultimate pranking adversary - trickster/archangel Gabriel! Rated T to be safe.
1. Chpt 1: Of Angels And Panties

**Disclaimer: Unfortunately, I do not own Supernatural.**

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CHAPTER ONE: OF ANGELS AND PANTIES

Dean and Sam were enjoying their first real break in weeks, kicking back and downing some beers together. Suddenly, a thump, a crash and an '_ouch!'_ informed them of Castiel's arrival. The angel tottered in, rubbing his rear end. His coat was buttoned and tied shut, which wasn't like him at all. He then abruptly put his back against the wall.

"Someone left a basket of clothes out there again," he notified them, glued to the wall. "I trust you to find the owners and reprimand them for their carelessness?"

Dean gave an exaggerated sigh. "How many times do I have to tell you; it's a laundry basket! It's _supposed_ to be out there!"

Sam shut his laptop and turned to the perpetually confused angel. "What's the matter, Cass? Another case? And why are you so far back?"

The angel blushed. Yes, he actually turned scarlet. "Um – no, it's not a case."

"Then what is it? Spit it out, Cass," Dean sat up, interested.

"I – er – I need some help," Castiel said, blushing even deeper. He shifted, and pulled his coat tighter around him. "With – er – something." He finished, embarrassed.

"Well, we can't help you until you tell us what it is," Sam said, concerned.

"Don't get your panties in a wad, Cass, just tell us what it is," Dean said impatiently.

"What?" All the blood drained from Castiel's face. He turned on the spot, not unlike a dog, trying to see his own bottom. "How could you see? I don't understand! Is it an extra enchantment? No, it can't be! Then –"

"Cass!" Dean yelled, trying to calm the flustered angel. "Just tell us what happened and we'll try to help you!"

The angel stopped revolving, and stared at the elder Winchester, the blush back on his face. "Um – you see, um, Gabriel was, uh, a little, er, unhappy with me because I, uh, _accidentally, _um, kind of caused his hair to fall out and –"

"You what?" Sam said incredulously; Dean was overcome by a fit of silent giggles.

"It was an _accident! _I apologized again and again! But then, for some reason, he said 'game on' and then, next thing I know…." Castiel trailed off.

"What?" both Winchesters said simultaneously.

"He enchanted…..he enchanted….." Castiel stuttered. "He enchanted a pair of pink panties to stay on me permanently! And…they're a bit….too…_tight._" He finished miserably.

This time, both Dean and Sam succumbed to peals of laughter. Castiel stood there, close to tears, as the brothers rolled around on the floor, pounding the ground with their fists.

"_It's not funny!_" he growled, but that only made the brothers laugh harder.

Finally, Dean stopped laughing for long enough to sit up. He wiped away a tear and said, "God, Cass, don't you understand? Gabe's started a prank war!"

"A what?" Castiel said, utterly nonplussed.

"A – prank – war," Sam gasped, getting back up and, after a few seconds, quieting down. "It's a full out angel – on – angel prank war!"

"But Gabe didn't think of one thing," Dean said, with a glint in his eye. "Cass has the lords of pranking on his side!"

"So you will help me?" Castiel said, cheering up considerably.

"Of course, Cass," Dean smiled. Then the smile widened. "But first things first. Let's see Gabe's handiwork!"

This time the angel went an alarming shade of purple.


	2. Chpt 2: The Beginning, Atleast For Cass

CHAPTER TWO: THE BEGINNING, ATLEAST FOR CASS

Castiel sat forlornly on the only chair in the motel room as the Sam researched on the laptop and Dean talked to Bobby on the phone.

"Yeah, you heard right," Dean said. He grinned as Bobby asked him something.

"Oh, Bobby, you dirty boy," he chuckled. "It's pink and frilly, or so he says….no, he refuses to show us….what am I supposed to do, hold him down and strip his clothes off? No thanks Bobby, I don't swing that way…._what kind?_ What does it _matter? _Are you alright, Bobby? ….no…..i dunno, Sammy's researching it now…..sure….'k thanks Bobby, I'll keep you up to date."

Dean flipped his phone shut and went over to his brother, who was looking intently at the laptop screen.

"Find anything?" Dean inquired, bending down to see.

"Uh, yeah, I think I know what caused it," Sam said, not looking up. Castiel sat up straighter.

"What is it?" He asked in a scared voice.

"It's a curse," Sam said.

"Not just any curse, this a bad mother," Dean said, reading the page. Then, with a smile, he said, "And guess what it was used for?"

Castiel shook his head. "I do not know Dean; please hurry it up, I cannot feel anything…._down there_." He said, his discomfort obvious.

Hiding a grin so that he doesn't make the already uncomfortable angel even more uncomfortable, Sam consoled him by saying, "It was used for humans who….um….displayed their….uh….bounty…..unnecessarily. The curse sticks the garments to the body for a certain amount of time before disintegrating. Though it's never been used for…." He gestured at the mortified angel.

"So I have to stay this way for how much longer?" Cass asked, tears in his eyes.

"It's…not given here, Cass," Sam felt genuinely sorry for the poor angel.

It took a few hours, but the curse finally wore off, and Castiel expressed his happiness by tugging off all his clothes and dancing around the room, or trying to, but, unfortunately, his celebrations were cut short by a green faced Sam yelling "NO! MY EYES!" and a pained Dean who muttered "We're happy for you, but you don't need to scarr us for life, you know," before covering up the angel with the trench coat, which had landed in the kitchen sink, a result of the ecstatic angel's gaiety.

"Now," A visibly happier Cass rubbed his hands, after he had put all his clothes back on. "You said that in these…_prank wars_, both sides try to humiliate the other as much as possible?"

"Yeah, pretty much," Sam came out of the bathroom after throwing up his lunch. Though he still looked pretty green, Dean noticed.

"So what do we do to humiliate Gabriel?" Castiel asked thoughtfully. Then he suddenly snapped his fingers, startling the brothers. "I've got it!"


	3. Chpt 3: Gabe's A Special Person

CHAPTER THREE: GABE'S A SPECIAL PERSON

Gabriel was having a wonderful day. His hair had been grown back; he had put the 'Panty Curse', as he had now christened it, on Castiel, and he was now enjoying a chilled ice tea in a lovely bar and restaurant on earth. Nothing could disturb him now. Or so he thought.

For two towns over and quickly coming closer, was the very angel who had been subjected to the wrath of the lingerie department, along with his human friends, Sam and Dean Winchester. But he didn't know that just yet. So he just sat back and enjoyed the ice – cold beverage.

Meanwhile, in the speeding Impala, the three men (or rather the two men and one angel in a meatsuit) were having an argument.

"Why does it have to be me?" Sam whined from the passenger seat, subjecting Dean and Castiel with the bitchiest bitch face he could muster up.

"'cause, Sammy – boy," Dean said, smiling serenely. "Cass doesn't want to do it, and he's an angel so you can't argue with him, and I'm older and wiser, so you have to listen to me. And I say you have to do it. That's why it has to be you. Geddit?"

"But it's not fair!" Sam pouted.

"It's only for, like five minutes, bro," Dean said, enjoying this moment thoroughly. "And we promise not to tell anyone."

"You better not," Sam said, and then sighed. "Fine, Cass, I'll do it."

Castiel, who until now had been looking from one Winchester to the other, smiled widely and clapped his hands like a child. "Alright! Look out Gabriel, 'cause Team Good Angel Army is coming to get you!"

Sam looked back at Castiel with raised eyebrows. Dean coughed. "'Team Good Angel Army'? Seriously, Cass?"

"Why?" the angel seemed confused. "Don't you like it? I thought it was innovating and inspiring."

"No names," Dean said firmly and floored the accelerator, driving them faster towards their destination.

Gabriel was now sick of iced tea. He snapped his fingers at the barmaid. "Beer, Esmeralda," he said.

"Sorry bub-o, my shift's over now, so you gonna hafta wait until the next one comes," Esmeralda took off her apron and laid it on the table; then she disappeared through the back door.

Gabriel sighed.

Then, through the same door the previous barmaid had left, a beautiful woman walked in, tottering on stilettos. She tripped over the rug and fell on her face the moment she was inside the door. Gabriel smiled. Foolish humans provided good entertainment.

The barmaid, for that's what she was, picked up the apron Esmeralda had left on the table and succeeded in tying it around her waist after a few tries, and muttered expletives.

Gabriel's patience was wearing thin. "I want beer," he said impatiently, snapping his fingers at her.

"_Oh, sure_," the barmaid squeaked in an unnaturally high pitched voice, then coughed and said in a normal female voice, "I mean, sure."

She went over to the back of the counter and with her back to him, made a big show of opening the beer bottle. Finally, when Gabriel heard the pop of the cap, he had to restrain himself from crying out 'hallelujah!' the barmaid plopped the beer in front of him, obviously pleased with herself.

Gabriel shook his head and downed the bottle. He knew better than to ask for another. So, to pass the time, took out his phone and enjoyed the photos he had taken of Castiel in the pink panties.

Suddenly, he felt a…_sensation_ in his intestines. He paused, but the feeling had passed, so he resumed admiring his handiwork.

Before he knew it, there was a sound like plunger in a toilet, and Gabriel's intestines emptied themselves.

Gabriel's eyes went wide. He was mortified. He cast furtive glances all around to see if anyone had witnessed what had happened. Then he smelt it. It was so strong it almost knocked him out of his chair. The other people in the bar had also begun to notice it. They flapped their hands in front of their faces, glaring at the offender of public places. He shook his head helplessly; what could he say? Then the door opened.

Dean and Cass arrived, with the klutzy barmaid in tow. They were grinning. Realization dawned on Gabriel's face, immediately replaced by anger.

But before he could say anything, Dean walked over to him and said loudly for everyone to hear, "Uncle Gabe! Why did you go out of the house? You know you're not supposed to, not with that condition of yours," then he stopped in his tracks and covered his nose. "Woah! What the bloody – wow, that's….._strong_!"

Gabriel hung his head in shame and embarrassment.

"See, you proved me right," Dean said nasally (he didn't remove the hand from his nose, nor did he lower his volume). Now the whole bar was listening in. "I told you it was dangerous to go out with that condition –"

"What condition? I don't have a condition!" Gabriel squeaked out, but in vain. Everyone in the bar was now shaking their heads and whispering 'special person' among themselves. Some were even twirling their fingers at their temples. "And I'm not special!"

"Alright, Uncle Gabe," The barmaid intervened. With a shock, Gabriel realized it was Sam. "Let's go home."

They hoisted poor Gabriel off the barstool and helped him out the door, leaving the bar whispering about how crazy people were allowed to roam around freely these days.

The moment they were out of earshot, the three men broke out in laughter.

"Genius!" Sam squealed, having completely forgotten he was still female. "Utter genius! Laxatives in his beer….where do you come up with this stuff?"

Castiel was too busy laughing to respond.

Gabriel tried to look as intimidating as he could with soiled pants, which didn't have a lot of effect. "I'll get you back for this," he growled. "And you humans were foolish to involve yourselves."

"Why is that?" Sam asked, cocking his head mockingly.

"Because," a beatific smile lit up Gabe's face. "Now I have three targets to hit, and I can hit anyone I want, whenever I want!"

With that, Gabriel vanished, leaving the three men behind to take in what he had said.


	4. Chpt 4: Sam And The Clowns Of Doom

CHAPTER FOUR: SAM AND THE CLOWNS OF DOOM

_I'll get them for this!_ Gabriel thought angrily as he peeled off the soiled pants. _I'll hit them when they least expect it. I'll… _Gabriel smiled. He had just thought of the perfect idea.

Sam came back to the motel room alone (Dean and Cass were at the bar, downing a few beers and having a good laugh at Uncle Gabe's 'accident'.

After Sam took off the wig and the makeup and had a leisurely bath, he threw himself onto the bed and sighed. _Those heels nearly killed me…_

He nodded off and was soon snoring away peacefully, when a sound woke him up. He sat up, disoriented, and rubbed his eyes. The room was pitch dark, and he couldn't see anything.

"Hello?" he called out sleepily.

He heard the sound again. The rustling of clothing, like someone was wearing harem pants and walking around in them. Then he heard the _whoosh_ of something being thrown in the air.

Now wide awake, he reached beside him and flicked on his bedside lamp. When he looked back towards the source of the sound, he froze. In front of him was…..a clown.

He grinned through the wide painted smile as he juggled multicolored balls.

_No, no, no. I'm dreaming, I'm dreaming, just dreaming, I'll wake up any second now... _he consoled himself. He blinked, rubbed his eyes, pinched his arm, even slapped himself but to no avail. Then, from behind grinning clown, there came a second clown. This one looked more dangerous, a frown on his face instead of a smile. He gave Sam a look and started performing cartwheels and somersaults.

Sam was paralyzed with fear. But when, from behind the still grinning clown, there came a third clown, this one balancing plates on sticks, he let out a bloodcurdling scream, and dived under the covers.

_Go away, go away, go away, _he repeated in his head, trembling. But he could still hear the periodic _whoosh, whoosh _of the juggling balls, the _thud, thud _of the clown doing somersaults and the _whooshwoosh, whooshwoosh of the _rapidly twirling plates.

"Go away, go away, go away, go away," Sam muttered tearfully under his breath.

Suddenly, with a flourish, the gymnast clown whipped off the sheets from the trembling lump that was Sam. Sam let out a high pitched shriek, vaulting from the bed and running to the door. He tried to open it, but it was locked.

"LEAVE ME ALONE!" he screamed at the clowns, who ignored him. He fell to his knees, sobbing. "I don't want your balloons! I just want to go home!" he cried, clutching the table beside the door, obviously trapped in some horrific memory. "_I want my MOOOMMYYYYYY!_" he fell onto the floor, sobbing pitifully. When he looked up again, the clowns had disappeared.

He was still there at 3 in the morning, sniffling, when Dean and Castiel pushed open the door, smacking Sam's butt with it. This resulted in a fresh deluge of tears, as Sam thought that the clowns of doom had made a comeback, and left the two newcomers trying to figure out what had happened.

When they calmed Sam down enough to find out what had happed, Dean vowed vengeance.

"Don't you worry, Sammy," he said, patting his brother on the back. "We'll get him back for this."

"And I know just how we're going to do it!" Castiel said, smiling widely.

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**R and R please!**


	5. Chpt 5: An INKling Of What's In Store

CHAPTER FIVE: AN _INK_LING OF WHAT"S IN STORE

As Dean prepared for the newest prank they were going to play on Gabriel, he contemplated their situation.

A week ago, they were killing yet another pagan god. Now they were in a prank war against an angel. And for the life of him, he couldn't decide which was more dangerous. Also, Cass and Sammy had already been subjected to Gabe's pranks. He shuddered to think what Gabe had in store for him. _But right now, Gabe's the one who should be scared_, Dean thought with satisfaction. He chuckled when he thought about what _they _had in store for their opponent.

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Gabriel was happy. He had managed to reduce Sam Winchester to tears, not a mere feat. But when faced with a clown, he would crumble like Silly Putty. He wasn't very concerned about the next prank they were going to play on him. _Sam will take a while to recover….heh heh heh._

He was in the mood for a piece of cake today. He didn't know why, but he suddenly craved for cake. He flashed himself to his favorite bakery, Gabe's Cake Shop. It's only fitting that angels eat in a bakery more or less named after them. He pushed open the door, immediately rewarded with the aroma of freshly baked cakes.

He walked over to counter and was about to order, when the girl at the counter asked him, "Are you here to order?"

The angel raised an eyebrow. "How do you people say it…._duh!_"

Not catching the sarcasm in his voice, the girl pressed a button on the counter. With a deafening _BANG! _atorrent of balloons and streamers fell from the ceiling.

"Congrats," the girl said, grinning. "You're our thousandth customer! You get a Gabe's Special, made personally by Gabe Miller, the owner himself!"

Who was he to refuse free food?

After stuffing himself with the cake, which was absolutely delicious, he tottered out the bakery and stifled a burp. He was feeling exceptionally sleepy. _All that chocolate probably….Hmmm, I need a nap…._

Suddenly his legs failed him and he fell, face first, onto the pavement. The last thing he saw before blacking out was Cass, Sam and Dean looking down at him triumphantly.

_Damn…._

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When he woke up, the first thing he noticed was that he was in a deserted alley. He got up, groaning and rubbing his temples. The idiots had drugged him! Then he realized something else – he was shirtless. _What the hell?_ He tried to get up, but his back was sore, sore to the point where it was throbbing painfully. _What the #$% did they do?_

When he finally got the strength to get up, he saw his shirt lying in the dumpster. He angrily yanked it on, ignoring his increasingly throbbing back. He flashed himself to his home on earth and rushed into the bathroom. He pulled off his shirt and gave a cry of anguish when he saw his back.

There was a tattoo on his back which proclaimed, "Cass, Dean And Sammy Rule!" and, as a footnote, "Gabe Is A Special Person."

He growled. "I'll get them back if it's the last thing I do!"

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**R and R?**


	6. Chpt 6: Dean Faces The Music

**A HUUUGE thanks to The Mysterious Shadow for reviewing _each And every _chapter! You're AWESOME!**

**Also, thank you keacdragon for sticking with the story and not abandoning it!**

**And thank you randomlyirritated for the suggestions! **

**If anyone has a prank he/she would like to see here, PM me!**

**DISCLAIMER: I don't own Supernatural...*sigh***

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CHAPTER SIX: DEAN FACES THE MUSIC

Cass, Dean and Sam, or, as the angel called them despite repeated appeals from the Winchester brothers, the Team Good Angel Army was celebrating their triumph.

"Here's to the overlords of pranking, ones who got the best of even the Great Gabe himself!" Dean grinned, raising his beer in the air.

"Don't be so cocky, Dean," Castiel cautioned. "If my calculations are right, it's now Gabriel's turn to prank one of us."

"Yeah," Sam said. The first thing he had done when they entered the motel room was check it for any hidden clowns, then barricade the windows so that none could get inside. But even after all that, he kept throwing furtive glances at the window, as if a clown would kick his way in, Jackie Chan style. "And in case you haven't noticed, you're the only one who hasn't been pranked yet."

"Maybe that's because he knows he can't touch the overlord of the overlords of pranking" Dean said, flashing his brother a smug smile.

Sam rolled his eyes. "If I hear you say 'overlord' again, so help me God…"

"What can God do, Sam?" Castiel asked, perplexed.

"Uh, no, it's just a way of…forget it," Sam said, shaking his head. "So, what should we do tonight?"

"You know what?" Dean said suddenly, discarding the now empty beer bottle and getting up. "It's getting a bit stifling in here. We should go for a drive."

"But I don't feel like going for a drive," Sam pouted. "Nor does Cass. Am I right?" He turned to the angel.

"Actually, a drive sounds good. I am feeling stuffy too. It is probably because Sam insists on keeping the windows closed, and barred."

"Hey, clowns could get in! and I think we know that clowns can kill!" he looked meaningfully at Dean.

"That was a rakshasa, Sam," Dean said. "And you can do whatever you like, man. Me and Cass are going on a drive. Come on, let's go."

"_Don't leave me alone!_" Sam stage whispered. "_what if they,_" He jerked his head towards the window. "_Come back?"_

"Well, then, I guess you have to come with us," Dean said, making a mental note to get Sam to a psychiatrist as soon as possible.

Sam pouted and sulked some more, but finally agreed to go. They made their way outside, across the road where Dean had parked his Impala.

"Oh, baby," he cooed to it and stroked it lovingly before unlocking it and sliding into the driver's seat. "Did you miss me?"

"Honestly Dean," Sam said disgustedly, as he got in the passenger side. Cass got into the backseat and looked at Dean curiously as he whispered what seemed like tender things to the steering wheel. "Why don't you two just get married?"

Dean ignored Sam and, starting the car, groped around under his seat for a tape with his tongue between his teeth. "Come on, come on…ah, here we go!" he said happily, and popped in a Metallica tape.

No sound came out of the ancient cassette player on the dashboard. He frowned, and put his ear to the speakers. Suddenly, Justin Beiber's 'Baby' reverberated in the closed car.

"GAH!" Dean said, recoiling from the sound system. Sam and the angel had similar reactions, with Sam clutching his ears, and Castiel covering his head with his arms. They stayed liked that for some time, until Sam finally had the sense to turn off the player and take out the tape.

Dean gaped at the cassette in Sam's hands which declared 'Metallica – Ride The Lightning' on the cover.

He fished under his seat again and popped in another tape. One direction's 'What Makes You Beautiful' boomed out of the speakers. He pulled out the tape and inserted yet another one. Yet another pop song blared out.

Dean was in tears. "Every one of them," he muttered tearfully as he frantically pushed in tape after tape into the player, only to hear classical music and pop songs. "The bastard overwrote each and every one of my precious tapes!"

"Uh, Dean," Castiel said slowly. "Are you…okay?"

"No I'm not!" Dean wailed, tears rushing down his face. "_MY TAPES!_"

"Dean, please don't cry," the angel said uncomfortably. "I promise I'll get you new ones. Just stop crying…"

All of a sudden, Dean stopped bawling. He straightened up, lower lip trembling, and said angrily, "Screw the tapes. Get out of the car. We have a prank to concoct!"

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**R and R?**


	7. Chpt 7: What Is It With You And Poop?

**Dedicated to my sister randomlyirritated (basically because she just won't get off my case until I do)**

**Happy now?**

**Kaecdragon, The Mysterious Shadow, thank you again for the reviews and encouragement!**

**Kirabaros, thank you for the story alert!**

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CHAPTER SEVEN: WHAT IS IT WITH YOU AND POOP?

Dean stormed into the motel room and sat stiffly at the table. Sam and Castiel followed close behind, unnerved by Dean's outburst.

Dean paced around the room, muttering to himself. "Something so embarrassing, so humiliating, he'll be sorry he ever touched my baby," he growled.

"Possessive, isn't he?" Castiel commented.

"Oh, you have no idea," Sam replied. "This one time, I –"

"Stop chatting, you two and come help me teach this sonofabitch a lesson!" He snapped.

Castiel sighed. "Alright. I shall think of something so embarrassing, so humiliating, he'll be sorry he ever touched your…baby…" he was soon lost in thought.

Sam suddenly had an idea. "Hey guys, I dunno if this will work, 'cause it'll need Cass's angel mojo; but if it does…" he grinned.

"Spill."

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Gabriel was feeling wicked. _All of his precious tapes!_ He thought gleefully. He realized that the wrath of the eldest Winchester was something to consider, but for now, he was going to enjoy his walk on the beach, picturing Dean's face when he realized that his tapes were ruined.

A seagull flew over his head, emitting an unearthly shriek and startling him. _Damn birds…_

He continued to stroll down the beach, trying to ignore the seagull swooping above his head. Another seagull joined the former, a cacophony of shrieks emanating from then. Another, then another, and another of the birds joined the two.

Gabriel frowned. _What the hell?_ He smelled himself, just in case he smelt of fish. _Nope._

Then, the former Trickster felt something drop on his shoulder. He instinctively (do angels have instincts?) touched the spot, and rapidly withdrew it. _Eww! Stupid bird!_ He looked up angrily, only to get a facefull of seagull droppings.

"AARGH!" he cried out, swatting at his face. He started running towards the road. The birds followed him, dropping their little bombs on him every once in a while. He looked like quite a sight – a grown man running, flapping his arms around his head, with an honour guard of seagulls above him, raining droppings on him.

He somehow reached the motel where the Winchesters were staying without getting himself killed, or, (and this was a more difficult feat) killing any of the offending birds.

He pounded on the door, looking like a spectacular piece of modern art. Sam opened the door, took one look at the artistically decorated archangel, and burst out laughing. Dean and Castiel came over to the door, wondering what was so funny, and they, too, succumbed to laughter.

"Oh look!" Dean said gleefully, clutching his sides as he shook with mirth. "It's Guano Man!"

"Ooh, very good!" Castiel said, chuckling.

"I can't believe it actually worked!" Sam looked above Gabe's head out into the corridor. "But where are your intestinally challenged friends, Guano Man?"

A flap of wings and a '_squaak!'_ answered their question. A seagull flew up, probably trying to get out into the open sky, crashed into the ceiling and fell, splattering Gabriel on the way down. The archangel's scowl widened.

"Eww," Dean said, sniffing the air around Gabriel. "You stink."

Gabe lost it. "_WHAT IS IT WITH YOU PEOPLE AND POOP?"_ He shrieked, clawing at his hair. "_Every_ prank! _Each _and_ every _prank you play on me _HAS _to include poop. Except for the tattoo. BUT STILL! POOP, POOP, POOP! You've got poop in the brain!"

Initially, there was dead silence at Gabe's outburst. Then Castiel surprised everyone by giggling. "You said 'poop' way too many times for this to be intimidating." He sniggered. Then he added seriously, "I am, of course, assuming you want to be intimidating…"

There was uproarious laughter at this.

"What's so funny in that?" Gabriel asked incredulously. But they were laughing too hard to hear him. "Ugh, forget it. I am done playing nice, let me tell you that. And if poop ever comes near me with a ten – foot – pole" – they laughed even harder at this, with made Gabriel storm away, glowering. He yelled behind him, "You're gonna regret this! You're all gonna regret this!"

When they finally stopped laughing long enough to sit up, Castiel asked, "I didn't understand one thing – how can poop _go_ to Gabriel, let alone with a ten – foot – pole?"

The laughter could be heard all the way to the lobby of the motel.

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**Reviews are much appreciated! :)**

**By the way, do you think i should wrap it up now? Has it gone on too long? Review or PM me your opinion!**


	8. Chpt 8: Get Out Of My Hair!

**First off, you guys are A.W.E.S.O.M.E! Thanks a TON for all the encouragement and ideas! I'll try and put all of them in this story!**

**Leilabeth, AMPGrl88, thank you for favoriting! **

**Wolfnymph1, Kylie66100, Leya, Thank you for the story alert!**

**Kaecdragon – LOL, good idea, but I think more poop would just drive poor Gabriel insane! I'll try to include chickens though ;)**

**The Mysterious Shadow – I agree. Nair in shampoo may be funny, but it's too cruel! KoolAid, on the other hand… :D **

**Kylie – Thank you so much! Glad you liked it! **

**Wolfnymph – Yay! So glad you love it! **

**Leilabeth – NO! Not the Guano Man! XD And great idea for the prank! I'll try to put it in there, but without the Destiel thing. I mean, I have read some Destiel fanfics, and I liked them, but I don't think I can write it well… no offence **

**Lastly, a heartfelt thank you to my sister, randomlyirritated. You may drive me crazy, but you do have good ideas! XOXO**

**Now, on with the story! **

**DISCLAIMER: The inspiration for this story comes from The Mysterious Shadow. Thanks again!**

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CHAPTER EIGHT: GET OUT OF MY HAIR!

It had been quiet for a while now. Thinking Gabe's next target was Cass, Sam and Dean were unperturbed. Poor Castiel on the other hand, couldn't even walk down the street without looking over his shoulder every few minutes, and having his hands perpetually placed on his rear, in order to save himself from any more panty curses.

After a tiring morning workout with his brother, (Castiel was too spooked to get out of the motel room) at the gym, Sam went into the bathroom and had a wonderful shower.

After an hour of waiting in sweaty clothes, Dean finally lost it. "Any longer in there and you'll turn into a woman, Sammy! Get out, now, before I break down the friggin' door!"

"Ok, ok, jeez!" Sam replied, and walked out, toweling his hair.

Dean stopped in his tracks and sniffed the air. "Do you smell that?" he said, almost dreamily.

The room was filled with the scent of strawberry, and muffins, and candy. Castiel frowned, momentarily forgetting his consternation. "Wait a minute," he stood up, realization dawning on his face. He walked over to Sam and yanked off the towel from his head. Dean gasped.

Sam's hair was dyed fluorescent pink, the kind that makes you feel you'll go blind if you stare too long at it. Castiel had a look of extreme sorrow on his face. "I'm sorry, Sam," he said sadly.

Sam frowned at their reaction and rushed to the mirror. He took one look at his new hairdo, and burst into tears. "NOO!" he wailed, trying to see all the way to the back of his head. "NO, NO, NO! My hair! Why my hair, Gabriel, you rotten snail!" He yelled at the ceiling.

Dean, who was, until then, staring at Sam in horror, turned to Castiel. "You know what that is, don't you?"

Castiel nodded grimly. "It's angel wing dye. The scent of strawberry and muffins, which you are smelling, is their trademark. To find the dye in this color, though, it must have taken Gabe a lot of time and hard work."

"And I thought Sammy couldn't turn into any more of a woman," Dean chuckled. Sam shot him a glare.

"It's not funny, Dean," he said, showing him the bitchiest bitchface he could muster up.

"Oh, c'mon Sammy," Dean said, throwing an arm over his brother's shoulder. "It'll wash off, won't it, Cass?"

Cass didn't answer.

"Cass?" Sam asked in trepidation.

"I'm sorry, Sam, but as far as I know, the dye is permanent. I am truly sorry."

Sam dissolved again into heart – wrenching sobs. Dean tightened his hold around Sam, at the same time trying to hide a smile. "We'll find an antidote, Sammy, don't worry," he said reassuringly, giving his little brother a shake.

"Really?"

"Yeah! And tell you what, until we do, you can pass the time at gay bars! See if you can pick up someone, huh?"

"You suck, Dean."

* * *

**Review please!**


	9. Chpt 9: Gabe Goes Vegan?

**Kaecdragon – Lol I realized that, so sometime in the next few pranks, we'll be having a buttload of poop! :P**

**The Mysterious Shadow – LMAO! XD Lo'real! Priceless! And don't worry, I have something much worse than dyed wings in store for Cass! *laughs evil laugh***

**JokerBD – thanks for reviewing! And about the poop pranks, same as above! :)**

**Leahelisabeth – Thanks for the story alert! :)**

**Wolfnymph – Thank you!**

**Aneywinchester – Hahaha XD Try praying to Cass! Maybe he'll gift you some of the stuff!**

* * *

CHAPTER NINE: GABE GOES VEGAN…?

Sam was again close to tears. Castiel had gone off to find something, anything with would get the dye off. Dean, meanwhile, was trying every method known to man trying to get the dye off.

"It's no use, Dean," Sam said in a resigned voice. "It's never going to come off. I'm going to spend the rest of my life looking like a unicorn pooped on my head and smelling like a seven – year – old girls bedroom!"

"Stop behaving like a drama queen, Sammy," Dean said, intent reading the label of a dye solvent. "Cass is out there right now, looking for a solution, I'm in here looking for a solution, and you're just sitting there, moping! Man up!"

"Man up?" Sam shrieked. "I'm looking like a friggin' transvestite, Dean! Don't tell me to man up!"

"Ok, ok, I'm sorry." He said, opening the bottle. "Alright, I think I got the instructions clear. You gotta soak it in solvent for about an hour and then rinse to get back initial color. Throw it into the washing machine to get best results."

"Washing machine? Gimme that!" Sam grabbed the bottle and read the label. "Dean! This is for clothes!"

"What? We tried the hair products already, so I thought I'd give this a try!"

"DEAN!"

"I got it!" Castiel flashed into the room just as Sam was about to lunge at his brother.

Sam stopped dead in his tracks, his hands halfway to Dean's throat. "You…what?"

"I found a way to get rid of the unicorn hair," The angel said, brandishing a tiny black bottle under Sam's nose.

"YAAY!" Sam literally jumped up in the air and hugged the angel. Castiel stood there uncertainly as Sam nearly squeezed the life out of him, unsure of what to do.

"What _is_ that, by the way?" Dean asked Castiel, who was still in the grip of the elated Sam.

"It's an angel wing dye remover, or something like that," Castiel said in a strangled voice.

He grabbed the bottle out of the angel's outstretched hand. "Sam, let go of him, you're crushing him,"

Sam shot him a glare, but let go of the angel.

"Can we please just get rid of the alien hair so we can get back at Gabriel?"

"Alright, alright,"

* * *

When Sam's hair was finally back to normal, the three of them sat down, trying to think of a way to get back at the archangel.

"Hmm…no, no…maybe…nope," Castiel muttered to himself, drawing amused looks from the Winchesters. "Oh yes!...no, that won't work either…wait, I've got it!"

Sam and Dean looked at him, afraid to ask. "Here's how it goes…"

* * *

Gabriel was relaxed, more relaxed than he had been these past few days. He had had to move heaven and hell to get the dye (no pun intended). But it was oh, so worth it!

He walked down the road to the nearest restaurant. He was going to treat himself to a lovely dinner of veal, or steak? No, he would rather have chicken.

He waltzed into the restaurant and was led to a table. The waitress raised an eyebrow when she took his order ("can you make a chicken whole? Like you make the pig with the apple in his mouth and stuff? Only, in the chicken's beak, put a hardboiled egg!"), but went inside anyway. A little more than an hour later, the waitress stepped out of the kitchen, with the pale chicken in its full glory, complete with a hardboiled egg in its mouth, just like Gabe wanted.

"Here you go," the waitress plopped down the plate in front of him, obviously happy that she was able to complete the task. "We couldn't cook it much, or some parts would be overcooked, so, um, it's pretty rare. I hope that's fine?" she looked at Gabriel questioningly, and when he nodded, continued. "Uh, if you need anything else, let me know."

Gabriel smiled and picked up his knife and fork. Just as he was about to dig in, he thought he saw the chicken move. He looked at it closely, the chicken remained motionless. It suddenly looked creepy to him, almost uncooked, fresh. As if it could get up any moment and…_no, no, that isn't possible. _The archangel steeled himself and made to cut himself a piece of the chicken when, suddenly, the chicken gave produced a weird sound and looked up at Gabriel with empty eye sockets. The egg in its mouth rolled out and fell off the table.

Gabriel sat there, paralyzed, as the chicken got up painfully and turned on the spot, slowly turning its back on him. _No, not its back, its butt! No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no!_

Before he could do anything, the chicken shot out a missile from its back end, and then collapsed, dead at last.

"CASTIEL!" Gabriel yelled out, drawing glances from the other eaters. He pushed himself away from the table, threw down some money, and stormed out of the restaurant.

Meanwhile, the angel and his two partners in crime were at a separate table, trying not to laugh too hard.

"That – was – awesome!" Sam said, grinning.

"Did you see his face? He actually thought the chicken came alive!" Dean said gleefully.

"That is impossible," Castiel said, smiling widely. "The chicken was dead, it had been cooked. I only made it seem like it had come alive and made it shoot out the package we had bribed the cooks to place near the…butthole."

Sam sniggered. He raised his glass and announced, "Here's to us getting Gabe again, and for being the reason for his newfound fear of chickens!"

"Hear, hear!"

* * *

Gabriel waited as long as he could, but his stomach was all out of bile and he was hungry. He finally dragged himself to another diner and dropped into a chair. The waitress came over and asked, "May I take your order? And if I may make a suggestion, try our new double bacon cheeseburger!"

"NO!" the archangel yelled, then calmed down when the waitress looked at him weirdly. "Um, I mean, I'm a vegan. So, um, can you show me some vegetarian choices?"

"Ookay..."

* * *

**Reviews are what keep me going!**


	10. Chpt 10: The Other Side Of Dean

**First things first – I forgot to put the disclaimer in the previous chapter, so…**

**DISCLAIMER: The inspiration for the previous chapter came from kaecdragon. Thanks and sorry I forgot! :)**

**Leilabeth – Well, your wait is over! :P**

**TheJokerBD – I know right? Sam WAS a bit too girly in this fic. So I have amended that and made him very macho in this one! :P And I will make **_**someone**_** turn into a girl, in this chapter only, actually! :D**

**The Mysterious Shadow – Plain weird and strange with a dash of creepy – in a good way? :P And soo sorry, but Cass gets the worst deal! *evil laugh* XD**

**Pottergirl2299 – Thanks for the story alert and favorite! And GREAT idea for a prank! I'll definitely put it in here! :D**

**Kaecdragon – I'm sorry, but I didn't get what you said – Gabe has a dog? Please explain… oh and I'm really sorry I forgot to credit the chapter to you!**

**Kirabaros – Yes, it was a poop missile! Thanks for laughing! :D**

**Aneywinchester – Thank you! :D**

**Thank you randomlyirritated for (unofficially) betareading my entire story and providing me with great ideas!**

**Wokay, on with the story!**

**DISCLAIMER: The inspiration for this one came from Leilabeth and TheJokerBD. Thanks! :)**

* * *

CHAPTER TEN: THE OTHER SIDE OF DEAN...

Gabriel angrily yanked open his refrigerator. He snatched up anything that may have come from animals, be it meat, eggs or something he didn't recognize that had been lying in his fridge for a month. And threw them all away. He knew by now that Castiel was behind this, but he couldn't help himself. He would never eat meat, eggs, or even dairy products, ever again in his life! And it was all that moronic angel's fault. _Or_, he paused, _it could have been Dean's idea. He does seem like the type to think up such pranks…_

He straightened up, slamming the fridge door shut. _Well, I'm no less! I told him I'll make him regret he ever got himself involved, and now I'll keep that promise!_

* * *

Dean groaned, turning over the hundredth time. He wasn't getting any sleep. He shut his eyes tightly and willed himself to fall asleep. He could hear Sam snoring in the other bed. Castiel had to go for an errand somewhere and he wouldn't be back for a couple of days. He slid in and out of consciousness throughout the night.

When he woke up the next morning, he felt really weird. Really, _really_ weird. He rolled of the bed and landed on the floor. The scratchy rug scraped against his bare chest. Sam's bed was empty. Sounds of rushing water came from the bathroom. He got up, eyes drooping with tiredness, hoisted up his boxer shorts (which had suddenly become loose) and had just made his bed, when Sam came out of the bathroom with a toothbrush hanging out of his mouth.

He took one look at him, made a sound like a dying chipmunk, and rushed back into the bathroom yelling, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" he slammed the bathroom door shut. "Damn you, Dean!"

Dean raised an eyebrow. What had gotten into Sam?

"Um, excuse me," Sam's muffled voice came from behind the closed bathroom door. "Could you please, uh, _cover up_? You can take the bed sheet if you like…"

Dean sighed in exasperation. "What the hell bro? I'm wearing boxers! And –" he stopped, clutching his throat. His voice sounded like a girl's!

"What the hell happened to my voice?" he squeaked.

"I don't know, ma'am," Sam's slightly desperate voice came from the bathroom. "But we'll figure it out as soon as you cover up, 'k?"

"'Ma'am'?" Dean said, disbelievingly. He rushed to the mirror and let out a strangled yelp when he saw his reflection. He was a girl! An attractive busty blonde!

_I'm pretty hot, though,_ he thought, admiring himself. _Yeah, I would sleep with me._

"Um, ma'am?"

Dean picked up a bed sheet and wrapped himself in it. "You can come out now!" he called out.

The bathroom door opened hesitantly, and Sam slowly stepped out, eyes on the ground. Without looking at Dean, he said uncomfortably, "Uh, you don't remember coming here? Are you sure? Do you remember a man, uh, a bit shorter than me, dirty – blonde hair cut in a crew cut, fancies himself as a ladies' man?"

"Hey!" Dean said indignantly. "I don't 'fancy' myself as a ladies' man! It ain't my fault if the ladies like me!"

Sam's eyes widened. "Dean?" he said, incredulously. "Is that you?"

"Hey, Sammy,"

Sam sighed in relief. "Thank God! I thought you ditched some girl here and ran off, leaving me to deal with the consequences!"

"I wouldn't do that to you!"

"You have done that before, Dean, remember?"

"Oh yeah…good times…"

Sam glared at Dean; then chuckled. "Alright, Deanna, let's find you some clothes that fit you! The female you, I mean…"

"Shut up, Sam!"

* * *

A few hours later, after some 'this'll make me look like a girl!' on Dean's part and some 'You _are_ a girl, Dean!" on Sam's, they finally collapsed, exhausted, at a bar, having bought one outfit, which Dean now wore.

"Did you call Cass?" Dean asked.

"That's the seventy–eighth time you've asked me that," Sam said, infuriated. When Dean kept looking at him, he sighed. "Yes Dean, I've called him again and again. He's not picking up. I've left a dozen messages on his cell. He's probably busy, Dean."

"Call him again. Tell him to drop everything and come right now." suggested Dean, curling his lip as two men in the next booth whistled and winked at him. "Damn, _am_ I that hot?"

"Dean –" He started, but he was cut off by one of the men from the next booth who had sauntered over and placed a hand firmly on the table. He was much larger than Sam, had gigantic muscles, and smelled strongly of alcohol. Not a good combination.

"Hey, beautiful," The man drawled, with what was obviously supposed to be a winning smile, but came over more like the man was suffering from acute gastritis. "You wanna ditch Sasquatch here and join some real men over there in our booth?"

"Uh, no thanks, I'm, uh, fine with, uh, Sasquatch, here," Dean said uncertainly.

"Sure you don't want to reconsider?" The man waggled his eyebrows, which, combined with the constipated smile looked kind of horrifying. Dean looked to Sam for help.

"Look, man, he – uh, _she_ doesn't want to come with you. Why don't you just leave her alone?"

"Why don't you just mind your own business?" he turned to glare at Sam.

"He is," Dean cut in. Both Sam and the man looked at him. "Minding his business, I mean. Me," he added, when both Sam and the man gave him blank looks. "I'm his business. Aren't I, honey?" he said, scooting over to put an arm through Sam's.

"Uh, yeah, yeah," Sam said, catching on. "So, uh, go away, before I, um, pound ya!"

The man narrowed his eyes at the younger Winchester. Then, without warning, he grabbed Sam's collar and hoisted him out of his seat. "What did you say?"

"Uh, leave her alone and nobody gets hurt?" Sam said, giving him a weak smile.

"You're dead."

He swung a fist at Sam, and would have knocked a few teeth, if he hadn't been so drunk. As it was, he missed, and the fist went into the table instead. Sam yanked his collar out of the man's grasp and drew back his fist to deliver a right hook. But, unfortunately, the man's friend had arrived to help him out. He grabbed Sam's fist and twisted it, making Sam hiss in pain.

"Alright, that's it," Dean said, and jumped up.

He went for the one twisting Sam's arm first. He punched him in the gut. The man let go of Sam and got a hold of Dean. Sam turned around and unleashed the wrath of Sammy on the poor man. He punched and kicked him until he was lying on the floor, whimpering.

"You okay, Dean?"

Dean nodded, massaging his arm where the man had grabbed him. They turned around to deal with the other one, but he had already run away.

"Phew!" Dean let out a sigh of relief. "That was close!"

"A little too close," Sam said, taking out his cell phone. "I'm telling Cass to get his butt here now."

"Hallelujah! Finally, Sam sees the light!"

"Shut up, Dean. Let's just get out of here before someone calls the cops."

Sam dialed Castiel's cell phone as they drove to another bar. This time, the angel picked up. Sam told him where they were and hung up.

"You didn't tell him what had happened?" Dean looked at him questioningly.

"I didn't think he'd believe me over the phone. It's better if he sees for himself."

"Good call."

Suddenly, the angel strode in. Sam and Dean waved to him and the angel walked over to them. He seemed confused to see Sam with the apparent blonde woman.

"What?"

"Well, I always thought _Dean_ was more of a ladies' man,"

"See, I told you!"

"No, Cass," Sam said, shaking his head. "This _is _Dean."

"Oh."

"'Oh'? That's all you have to say?" Dean raised his eyebrows. "I look like freaking Kelly Clarkson and all you say is 'Oh'?"

"I do not understand how you want me to retaliate," Castiel said, bewildered at Dean's reaction.

"Whatever, just reverse whatever this is, and make me Dean, frustratingly hot ladies' man who you can't take your eyes off, again."

"If I may say so, Dean, you look much better as a woman." Castiel said. "Not that you weren't attractive as a man..."

Dean was stumped. "Uh, um, ah,"

Sam chuckled. "Would you stop making him blush so much and just turn him back?"

* * *

**Reviews are very much appreciated! :D**


	11. Chpt 11: Gabe's Green Thumb

**First off, sorry for the late update, I didn't have any time to type!**

**Tam1970 – thank you for the favorite and the review!**

**The Mysterious Shadow – yup! ;) and he probably has no idea he did… :D**

**Kirabaros – It's not just a Cass thing, as you'll see here… ;)**

**Venesa – thanks! And I wish I could keep Deanna, but unfortunately Dean won't stand for it! :D**

**TheJokerBD – the Destiel bit was for Leilabeth 'cause she requested it.**

**Leilabeth – thanks for the review and for putting me as favorite author! :D**

**Kaecdragon – thanks for the tip about the dog! And great idea! :D**

**Aneywinchester – Dean thought up the prank this time! :D**

**Celticmaiden : thanks for the review, story alert **_**and**_** the favorite! :)**

**Someoneunknown – considering this is a humor fic, and utter nonsense, they're supposed to seem childish and immature! And who'll laugh at deadly pranks? We'll all be too worried about the Winchester brothers and Castiel to appreciate the prank! :D and if you want something lethal, search for fics in the Hurt/Comfort, Adventure, Tragedy or Drama genres, I'm sure you'll find something good in there! :)**

**DISCLAIMER: The dog at the end of the chapter is all thanks to Kaecdragon! Otherwise it's all mine! (Yes, I am quite capable of thinking on my own, people) :D**

* * *

CHAPTER ELEVEN: GABE'S GREEN THUMB

Dean yawned widely as he drove back to their motel at 5:30 in the morning. The road was deserted and he was going at around 85 miles per hour. He looked over to his brother in the passenger seat, fast asleep, head leaned against the window. Castiel was curled up in the backseat.

"We're going to die," Sam said sleepily. "You know that, right? Either that, or we're going to jail."

"Go back to sleep, Sammy," Dean replied. "Besides, there's no one on the road. I can do 160 and no one will care. Everyone's asleep."

"We could be too," Sam muttered, rubbing his eyes and sitting up. "If you hadn't dragged us down here in the middle of the night to set up the prank."

"With great power, comes great responsibility."

"How is that even related to this context?"

"I dunno, Sammy…look, I'm tired, ok. Just go back to sleep, and I'll wake you up when we get back to the motel."

"I can't go back to sleep. I'm wide awake."

Dean sighed. They drove in silence for a while, wind rushing in through the open windows. Suddenly, a drowsy voice came from the back seat.

"Gabriel is going to be _mad_!"

The three of them laughed all the way back to the motel.

* * *

Gabriel was watching a late night horror movie about zombies. and he was bored beyond belief. _Really? All they do is 'Aaaargh'? Please, zombies seem more evolved than these people. And where do all the guns and ammo come from? It's not like the average person has an arsenal ready, locked and loaded in case of a zombie attack…_

A noise interrupted his thoughts. He looked at the time – 5: 52 am. He stood up, put on his bathrobe and went over to the door to check it out. He peered outside through the glass, but there was nothing there. He frowned. He was sure he had heard something. He pulled open the door and stepped out. He looked around, clutching the ends of his bathrobe together. He saw something in the middle of his lawn. He started towards it but froze when he heard a click. He looked down at his foot, eyes widening when he saw he had stepped on a button of some sort. And he had just pushed it.

He didn't even have time to blink, before the explosion took place. Something wet and sticky splattered him and covered his entire body. He stumbled blindly around the lawn, when he heard a second click. And a third. And a fourth. Before he knew it, bombs were exploding all over the place, hurling more of the sticky stuff at him.

"AAAARGH!" he yelled, running around the lawn, which only resulted in more bombs exploding, and him getting a mouthful of…of… "NOOOOO!" he sputtered, clawing at his mouth. "NOT MORE POOP!" he wailed. The stench was registering now, and it swept him off his feet, literally. He fell into the muck, face first, which made him gag and throw up everything he had eaten the previous day.

The neighbors were waking up, coming to the windows to find out why he was making such a racket so early in the morning. When they saw the covered–in-muck human–like creature (he was almost unrecognizable), more than a few of them called the police.

* * *

The rest of Gabriel's day was spent in the station, explaining to the police why he was exploding manure bombs in his garden. "You could very well fertilize it by hand, it ain't that difficult, ya know," the inspector said, shaking his head, hand over his nose and mouth. "You people are always looking for shortcuts."

When the archangel finally trudged home, still slathered with the muck, it was already 10 o' clock in the night. He opened the door, thinking how to murder Castiel, Sam and Dean, when his dog showed up, also covered from head to rapidly wagging tail in the very poop that was now adorning his lawn.

"Alright, let's go have a bath," Gabriel said, scooping up the terrier. Then he stepped into his home, and his mouth fell open. The entire place looked like it had been ransacked by intestinally challenged cattle. _The windows…_ he realized with a sinking feeling, turning towards the French windows which he had left wide open, giving the flying poop entry into the house.

He sniffled. _This day _cannot_ get any worse!_

Suddenly, his computer beeped. He had mail. He went over to the computer, wiped the poop off the screen and clicked on the link sent to him by someone unknown. A YouTube video pooped up, showcasing him being bombed by the poop squad. _They had cameras on me!_ He gulped as he saw himself pirouetting across the lawn, being hit by showers of manure. The video had over 10 million views and 32,000 comments.

_They're dead._

* * *

**Review please! :D**


	12. Chpt 12: Cass Has Daddy Issues

**Sorry to say, my muse has taken a one – way ticket to nowhere, so I'll be wrapping up the story in the next two chapters. :(**

**ROSELLA1 – Thank you for the story alert! And thanks for loving it! :P**

**SARA1988 – Thank you for favoriting me! And glad you like it! :D**

**Zoyzoybaloy – Thank you for the story alert and the favorite! :)**

**Genanimal – Thank you for favoriting! :)**

**The dark knight and wolfnymph – LOL :D Thanks for liking it! :)**

**Kirabaros – Glad you liked it! Thanks for laughing! :)**

**The Mysterious Shadow – LMAO thank you soo much!**

**Kaecdragon - :D thanks youz! **

**TheJokerBD – Glad you liked it! :)**

**Aneywinchester – Absolutely, Gabe **_**is **_**crazy mad! :D**

**Venesa – So would I, Venesa, so would I…:P**

**Leilabeth – Thank you for liking it! :D**

**No pen names left – 'Good Angel Poop Squad' LOL love it! :D and thank you for the story alert! :)**

CHAPTER TWELVE: CASTIEL HAS DADDY ISSUES

Gabe was feeling like his old self for the first time in days. Weeks, really. And why not? The poop smell had finally gone away, the neighbors had stopped looking at him weirdly, and random kids on the street had stopped calling him "The Spectacular Dancing Poop Man". most of them, anyway. But best of all, he had the perfect way to get back at all of them. He rubbed his hands together in anticipation. _Oh, he was _evil_!_

* * *

Castiel, Sam and Dean had not yet gone through all of the comments on the video they had posted.

"'_The Spectacular Dancing Poop Man_'?" Dean squealed, clutching his stomach. "These kids are good!"

"Ooh, ooh, look at this one!" Sam pointed at the laptop. "'I sure hope that's not _his_ poop he's waltzing around in.'!"

The three of them once more succumbed to peals of uncontrollable laughter.

"Ooh, and this one!" Castiel read out yet another comment. "'He could give all the ballerinas around the globe a run for their money.'!"

"Oh, stop, _stop_!" Dean begged, rolling around on the floor, banging his fists on the ground.

Suddenly, the laptop light blinked out. Sam frowned and tried to switch it on again. The laptop wouldn't start.

"Maybe the battery's down," Dean suggested.

"But I thought I charged it," Sam said and connected the laptop to the only outlet in the motel room. Nothing. He jiggled the switch, fiddled with the connections. The laptop wouldn't start.

"Hmmm," Castiel said thoughtfully. "Maybe this isn't anything to do with electric power. Maybe…Gabe did this!"

"Yeah right," Dean said, rolling his eyes at the angel. "I mean, yeah, Sammy's really attached to that thing, maybe even more than me and my baby,"

Sam rolled his eyes. "As if that's possible," he muttered.

"But this is bush league, even for dear little Gabriella," Dean continued as if he hadn't heard Sam.

Suddenly, Castiel disappeared.

"Great," Sam threw up his arms in exasperation. "The minute the source of amusement is gone, he up and vanishes. Literally!"

"Yeah," Dean agreed. "Me? I'll stick by you even when all is lost and you have turned into a dull, boring dweeb." He grinned and winked at his brother, and then disappeared.

Sam looked around for a second, not sure what had just happened. Then realization dawned on his face.

"Oh, Gabe," Sam said, shaking his head. "What have you done?" And then, "That was ironic."

And then suddenly, without warning, everything went black.

* * *

Castiel woke up on a cool, hard surface, head throbbing. He slowly sat up, blinking to clear the spots from his eyes. Everything was black. He rubbed his eyes, but still couldn't see a thing. _I've gone blind! Oh, wait, angels can't go blind. It must be dark in here. Yeah, that's it._

He slowly got to his feet, careful to feel above him in case he banged his head on the low ceiling. The air was cold, and dry. Though he couldn't see it, it seemed huge. He put his hands out; trying to find a wall he could follow to the door, if there was one. He didn't know who had abducted him, or why, but right now, his main priority was to get out of this place.

Suddenly, an earsplitting voice reverberated in the room. "CASTIEL, WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?"

Castiel sank to his knees, whipping his head around frantically to identify the source of the voice. terror gripped his heart as he realized who had abducted him.

"God?"

* * *

Castiel was scared stiff. Literally. He just sat there, paralyzed, as the voice boomed out again.

"OF COURSE IT'S ME! WHO ELSE WOULD HAVE THE POWER TO BRING YOU HERE?"

"A-any of th-the angels…" Castiel stuttered.

The voice paused for a minute.

"UH…WHATEVER. I AM YOUR FATHER."

"O-okay."

"DO YOU KNOW WHY YOU ARE HERE?"

"No, Father."

"DO YOU KNOW I WATCH EVERYTHING? KEEP AN EYE ON EVERY TEENY TINY THING ON THIS EARTH?"

"Yes, Father."

"DO YOU KNOW WHAT CAUGHT MY EYE A FEW MONTHS AGO?"

"No, Father."

"YOU! AND GABRIEL! AND THOSE INSUFFERABLE WINCHESTER BOYS!"

"But I thought – I thought you liked them!" Castiel frowned. "If you didn't, why did you keep bringing them back?"

"IT HAD TO BE DONE FOR THE GOOD OF THIS WORLD! BUT THAT IS BESIDES THE POINT! WHAT I AM TRYING TO SAY IS THAT INSTEAD OF DOING SOME GOOD IN THE WORLD, YOU AND THE WINCHESTER BOYS ARE PLAYING AROUND LIKE KINDERGARTENERS!"

"But _he _started it!" Castiel said petulantly.

"I DON'T CARE!"

Castiel flinched.

"YOU WILL GO APOLOGISE TO GABRIEL! GIVE HIM SOME CANDY! GET HIM DEODERANT!"

"Uh…okay?"

"BEGONE NOW!"

Castiel felt himself being flashed away again.

* * *

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	13. Chpt 13: What Happened To Dean And Sam!

**Hey guys! Thanks a ton for your encouragement! This is the second last chapter of the story, so its bit longer than usual. Also, it's a little bit in the Hurt/Comfort genre. But only a little bit. This chapter's a bit serious, so tell me if it gets too sad. Ok, enough with the 'bit's.**

**Aneywinchester – Gabe goes even lower in this chapter! :D**

**The Mysterious Shadow – Daddy issues **_**are**_** forbidden! :P I'm glad you liked it!**

**Kirabaros – you're right. It's totally Gabe-worthy. Thank for laughing! :D**

**Casismyfavorite – Thanks for reviewing **_**every**_** chapter! :D Glad you like it!**

**Dean's Bakery – Gabe's poopy rant was the highlight of the story for me too! :D Glad you liked it!**

**Pottergirl2299 – You'll just have to read on to find out! :D Thanks for liking it!**

**Gillykat – That's exactly what this chapter is about! Thanks for the favorite story, the story alert, **_**and **_**the favorite author! *hug* :D**

**DJ Sparkles – Thanks for laughing! :D And thanks for the story alert, favorite story, and that author alert! *hug* :D**

**Ticking-Crocodile – Thank you for the favorite story! :D**

**Disclaimer: Credit for Dean's prank goes to pottergirl2299. Thank you! :)**

**Now, on with the story!**

CHAPTER THIRTEEN: WHAT HAPPENED TO DEAN AND SAM?

Dean was very uncomfortable. And by uncomfortable, I mean positively nauseous. He awoke slowly, waiting for the room to come into focus. He tried to lift his head, and grimaced when the action made his head throb. He tried to gauge his surroundings. He was in a chair, but not tied to it. The air was stale and smelt vaguely of cheeseburgers. Above him, there was a light, a fan, and…a 'no smoking' sign which was lighted up.

His eyes widened. _Airplane! I need to get off before they take off!_ He jumped up, ignoring the throbbing in his head. He immediately banged the top of his head on the low roof of the airplane. "OW!"

"Dude, what are you _doing_?"

Dean whipped around to see a man, a boy really, come out of the cockpit. He was well above six feet, and had to stoop to avoid hitting his head on the top. He looked not more than twenty years old, with short dark hair, a lean body and a half-eaten hamburger in his hand. He was looking reproachfully at Dean.

"Dude, do you wanna get killed? Sit down and put on your seatbelt! As the pilot of this fine airplane, I am responsible for all passengers!"

Dean looked around the tiny aircraft. There were only four seats, including the one he had woken up in. a jolt suddenly made him sit down. He fought back nausea as he buckled in as tight as he could.

"Stupid turbulence," the pilot muttered. "I'm Jake by the way, pleased to meet you."

"Yeah, hi," Dean said, gritting his teeth as another jolt almost made him hurl. "Autopilot's a bitch, ain't it?"

"Autopilot? This thing doesn't have autopilot," Jake said, frowning. He held out the half-eaten cheeseburger. "Burger?"

Dean's eyes widened as he clutched the armrests. "No autopilot?"

Jake shook his head.

"Then, Jake, my friend," He said, trying to stay calm and not hyperventilate. "_Who the hell is flying the friggin' plane?_"

"Oh crap!"

* * *

Sam woke up in an auditorium. He was the only one in the audience, tied to the lone chair facing the stage. The whole place was dark. He blinked, painfully aware of the throbbing in his head. Suddenly, the stage lit up, startling him.

Gabriel stepped out of the wings, wearing a tux and holding a microphone, like an announcer. "Heya, there, Sammy!" He said cheerfully. "So glad you could make it to my show!"

Sam glared at him. "What have you done to Dean and Cass?"

"Well, I went easy on Cass, you know, since he's my brother and all," Gabriel said. "And I think what I did with Dean wasn't all that much, though I think he'll stay away from airports in the future. Cheeseburgers, too. You, on the other hand, I don't know you that well. I know you hate clowns, and love your hair. But not much else. Except of course, that you consider family above all else. So I have a real treat for you today!"

Sam let out a string of colorful curses.

"Cheerful, aren't we? Let's see if we can cheer you up with a little mind TV, shall we?"

Gabriel snapped his fingers.

* * *

Dean did all he could to keep from throwing up, or strangling the pilot.

Jake, apparently, was still in the learning stage.

"Of course, I don't even need to learn flying, I'm a natural," He called back to Dean through the open cockpit door as they did _yet another_ 360. "It's this plane," he said apologetically. "She's ready to go into the dumpster. When I get a proper one, I'll be able to fly her perfectly, trust me!"

Dean didn't trust himself to speak, so he just nodded and drew his seatbelt even tighter as he was thrown around in his seat._ God, please let it be over soon._

* * *

Sam was back in his old dormitory in Stanford. He knew it was only in his mind, he could still feel the ropes on his hands. But it looked pretty damn real. He could even smell the air. Unwashed laundry, books, and… cookies. Chocolate chip cookies.

He stumbled toward the kitchen, and in the darkened auditorium situated god knows where, Sam struggled against the bonds, his legs desperately trying to walk. He got the hang of it after a few tries. It was weird, walking even as he felt the ropes holding his legs together. He ran to the kitchen to see Jessica take out the fresh batch of cookies from the oven. He ran to her, but when he tried to touch her, he passed right through her. He fell against the kitchen counter. Jessica didn't seem to notice him.

Suddenly, someone knocked on the door. Jessica took off her mittens and went to open the door.

"Hey, Brady!"

Sam froze. He heard Brady come in. Jessica offered him cookies. Jessica came into the kitchen to get the cookies which were cooling on the counter, and passed right through Sam. Sam tried to touch her again, but in vain.

"Jess," He breathed. "Jess, don't go out there."

She didn't seem to hear him. He tried again, louder. "Jess? Jessica!" She just picked up the tray and walked outside to join Brady. Sam ran outside just in time to see Brady grab Jessica. She screamed. The cookie tray clattered to the floor.

"NO!" Sam yelled, even as in the auditorium where he was tied. "JESS!"

Jessica was pushed by some invisible force to the wall. Sam desperately swung at Brady, and his fist went right through him. Jessica slid up to the ceiling. She had stopped screaming. Suddenly, a key turned in the lock. Brady turned his head towards the sound, and disappeared into thin air. Jessica remained on the ceiling.

He watched the twenty-two year old version of himself walk into the dorm and leap onto the bed; He saw the drops of blood fall on his face and watched his horrified face as he saw his girlfriend pinned to the ceiling. He watched Jessica burst into flames, again. He stood there as Dean rushed in and dragged the twenty-two year old Sam out. He stood there, watching the dorm burn. Then, just like that, he was back in the auditorium.

He was disoriented for a few seconds; then he realized where he was. Gabriel had gotten off the stage, and was standing right in front of him. Seeing Sam tear-filled eyes, he smiled.

"Having fun yet?"

Sam didn't reply.

"Well, I guess not. Let's see if this'll put a smile on your face." He snapped his fingers.

This time, he saw his father make the deal with Azazel. He saw his father fall onto the floor, saw himself rush to him, screaming for a doctor. By the time he was back in the auditorium, the tears were freely falling.

Gabriel grinned at him. "Alright, you have to admit, this is the _greatest_ prank in the _history_ of pranking!"

"Prank?" Sam said, disbelieving. The tears had dried up; the sadness was replaced by anger. "This is your idea of a prank? Pranks supposed to be funny and harmless you incredibly disturbed excuse for an archangel!"

The smile was wiped from Gabriel's face. "This _is_ funny. For me, at least. And I'm not really harming, you, am I?"

Sam shook his head in disgust.

"Whatever," Gabriel suddenly said angrily. "This stopped being fun now."

He snapped his fingers, and Sam felt his world go black.

* * *

Just when Dean felt he couldn't hold back his nausea anymore, he suddenly felt his world go black. And, for the first time since he was introduced to the Angel Express, he was thankful for it.

* * *

Sam and Dean flashed into the room at the same time. They looked at each other for a moment; then Dean rushed to the bathroom to empty his stomach.

Dean staggered out of the bathroom, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. He saw Sam's red eyes and frowned. "What did he do?"

* * *

Dean paced around the room, fuming. Sam was sitting on one of the beds, staring into space. He couldn't erase his girlfriend's and his father's deaths from his mind.

"I am going to _kill_ him!" Dean said angrily. "How could he do that to you?"

Suddenly, Castiel flashed into the room, holding what looked like a super-sized gift basket in his arms. Dean abruptly stopped his pacing to stare at the angel.

"What is that?"

"Gift basket," Castiel mumbled, distracted. He was trying to tie a giant ribbon on the handle of the giant gift basket.

"Yeah, I see that," Dean rolled his eyes. "I mean, why do you have it?"

"It's for Gabe,"

Sam jerked out of his reverie. "What?"

"My father told me to give him a gift basket full of candy and apologize. He saw the prank war and is very angry. So I'm going to take this basket to him and apologize."

The Winchesters were stumped for a minute; then it dawned on them. "Looks like Cass wasn't spared," commented Sam.

The angel was confused at first. But when they explained it to him, he was downright furious. "_How dare he?_"

"I know!" Dean said.

"Does he know how much this gift basket cost me?"

"Yeah, exact- wait what?"

"That's not really the point here, Cass," Sam said, smiling at the angel's silliness.

"You know what?" Dean said, striding to their bags and pulling out a gun. "I think I'm going to go have a nice long chat with our friend Gaby." He looked at Sam. "Do you want to come?"

"Yeah sure, why not," Sam picked up another gun and followed his brother to the door. "Come on, Cass."

"We're not driving, are we?"

"No, Cass. You're flashing us there."

"Oh. Okay."

"Wait a minute! Make sure my pooping schedule isn't interrupted, okay?"

"Dean…"

"Alright, alright! Let's just go."

* * *

**I know, my writing quality is down in the dumps, and this chapter was incredibly _boring_, so feel free to give me flame reviews... but review all the same! :D**


	14. Chpt 14: The End

**Hey guys! Sorry for the late update!**

**Well, here we are. The last chapter of this saga!**

**Thanks a ton to all those who read, reviewed, alerted and favorited! You were my strength and inspiration! (Cue cheesy music)**

**randomlyirritated - Thank you for helping me out of sticky spots and spotting plot holes! :D**

**not-so-wicked-violet - Thank you for the inspiration! :)**

**kaecdragon - You were the first ever to review! Thank you! and thanks for the ideas! (Gabe Goes Vegan?) :D**

**The Mysterious Shadow - You reviewed EACH AND EVERY chapter! Thank you for your encouragement and ideas! (Get Out Of My Hair!) :D**

**aneywinchester - Thank you for reviewing, and also for being sad that i was ending the story! :D**

**Dean's Bakery - Thanks for finding the story intriguing! :D**

**Leilabeth - Thank you for your encouragement and ideas! (The Other Side Of Dean) :D**

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**pottergirl2299 - Thanks for reviewing and for the ideas! (What Happened To Sam and Dean?)**

**Kirabaros - Thanks for your reviews and for one of the two criticisms I got! it helped a lot! :D**

**Wolfnymph - thanks for reviewing and the encouragement!**

**stupid-nickel - Thanks for the idea!**

**celticmaiden,****DJ Sparkles, no pen names left, Tam1979, venesa, Kylie - Thanks for reviewing! :D**

**DISCLAIMER: Credits go to pottergirl2299, gillykat, kaecdragon and stupid-nickel! Enjoy, guys, and don't forget to tell me what you think! :D**

**Here we go! (I'm a bit insecure about this one, 'cause, as Chuck pointed out in the season five finale, 'endings are**_**hard**_**!')**

CHAPTER FOURTEEN: THE END

"…and then I'll press down on the wound so it hurts like hell, and then I'll open another artery, then-"

"Dean?" Sam's voice interrupted his brother's rant. "I don't think we should do anything."

Both Dean and Castiel stopped dead in their tracks, turning back with mouths agape.

"What?"

"Look, this has gone on too long, and it's getting out of hand." Sam said, steering his brother and the angel back to their room. "If we don't do anything, maybe he won't do anything either."

"But that means he wins, Sammy!" Dean said petulantly.

"Look, we have to be the bigger person here," Sam insisted, shutting the motel room door. "It's time to just stop the whole thing."

Dean crossed his arms and pouted.

"Dean?" Sam said.

"Fine."

"Cass?"

"Alright."

"Now nobody will play _any_prank on Gabe, however harmless it may be. Understood?"

"Yes, mom," Dean said, lounging back on the bed.

"I should be getting back to heaven," Castiel said, and flashed away.

"We should catch some sleep, and then get out of this town in the morning," Sam said, yawning widely.

"Hmmm," Dean mumbled. He was already half asleep.

Castiel hadn't flashed himself to heaven. He had, in fact, flashed himself to a certain house belonging to a certain archangel. The gift basket was in his arms. He had filled it with cookies, and bottles of deodorant.

Castiel was feeling very proud of himself for thinking up this magnificent prank. He walked up to the door and left the basket on the porch before flashing himself away.

_1:13 am_

Dean got up slowly, careful not to wake his brother. He picked up the tube he had taken from his brother's duffel and tiptoed out of the room, closing the door behind him with a soft click.

_2:27 am_

Sam got up, glancing over at his brother's bed to make sure he was still asleep. He took out his laptop, and powered it up, grinning to himself. He had some hacking to do.

_8:30 am_

Gabriel yawned as he got up and went into the bathroom. The left side of his face felt really heavy. He walked into the bathroom, turned on the lights, and screamed.

There was a Barbie doll stuck to his face.

He clawed at it, pulling at it, hurling abuses the whole time, but to no avail. The doll was there to stay.

"Superglue," Gabriel realized with a sinking feeling. "They superglued a Barbie doll to my face. _I will kill them._"

Admitting defeat, he went to the front door to get his newspaper. Instead, he found the basket. _Castiel must have put it here. He actually took 'God' seriously…heh heh._

He took the basket into the kitchen, switched on the coffee maker, and started ripping off the covering on the basket.

"Ooh, cookies!" The archangel squealed happily. He bit into one. "Oh lord, it has a gooey centre! Thank you for creating chocolate, God; it has made this world a better place!"

He gobbled up the whole lot, had three cups of coffee, and then settled in front of the television.

Suddenly, there was a gurgling in his stomach. Gabriel froze for a minute, and then leapt up sprinting for the bathroom, where he threw up the whole lot. He staggered out of the bathroom after purging the contents of his stomach, and then rushed back in to throw up some more.

Suddenly, there was a knock at the door.

Gabriel pulled himself up and stumbled to the front door, holding a hand over his mouth. He pulled open the door, revealing two men in plain black suits grinning at him.

The smiles slid right off their faces when they saw the man standing before them, in his pajamas, with a Barbie doll stuck to his face, smelling of vomit.

"Uh, is this the house of Mr. Gabriel?" One of the suits asked uncertainly.

"Yes."

"Would you like to get ready so we can take you on your fun breakfast date?"

"Fun-what-now?"

"You are aware that you are the winner of the 'Win a Fun Breakfast Date With Your Favorite Star' contest, right?"

"Oh, yes, yes, let me get ready then, I'll meet you out here," Gabriel shut the door in their faces.

Gabriel snapped his fingers, and his pajamas were replaced by a dark blue suit. He straightened his tie and went back to the front door. The men were startled when they saw him fully dressed. One of the men coughed.

"Uh, you still have, the, um…"

Gabriel touched the Barbie doll which was still hanging from his face. "What this? It's a new style, you see."

"Right."

The men escorted Gabriel to a limousine which was waiting for him. Gabriel spent the whole ride with his head out the window, trying to fight the nausea.

_Maybe it's Nicole Kidman. Or maybe Natalie Portman. Ooh, Scarlet Johansson!_

They pulled up in front of a posh restaurant, and Gabriel got out, clutching his stomach. He was going to have to find a bathroom soon. He walked in, and one of the suits guided him to a table in the corner.

"Hello, Mr…uh…Gabriel," a voice said from the chair. The archangel's eyes widened. _NO._

Justin Beiber smiled up at him, and gestured to the seat in front of him. Gabriel walked over, and suddenly hurled all over the singer.

"OHMYGOD!" Justin Beiber squealed, wiping the bile off his face. "WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?"

_I can't really say I'm sorry…_Gabriel chuckled to himself, then ran to find a bathroom.

Needless to say, the rest of the morning was hell, what with Gabriel spewing every two minutes, and Justin acting all 'professional' by sitting there in his vomit-covered clothes the whole time and not asking about 'Mr. Gabriel's' obvious fetish for Barbie dolls.

By the time Gabriel was dropped home, he was pale and shivering. He dragged himself to his couch and threw himself onto it. He fell asleep almost immediately.

Meanwhile, Sam and Dean were having a normal day. They had decided that they would stay for one more day, so that Sam can find a gig for them. They had an uneventful morning, and were now relaxing in their room, when Castiel showed up.

"I have a confession to make," He said, head bowed down in shame. "I pranked Gabriel."

There was utter silence for a minute. Then Dean said in a small voice, "So did I."

"Me too."

"Do you wanna go see?"

They reached Gabriel's house in splits.

"You put down Justin Beiber as his favorite star?" Dean shook with mirth. "Priceless!"

"But Cass, where did you get Ipecac from?"

"What's Ipecac?" Dean asked.

"It makes you throw up for hours," Castiel said gleefully. "I found it in one of those 24-hour pharmacies."

They saw Gabriel through the living room window, sprawled on the couch, Barbie doll hanging off his face. Stifling their laughter, the trio went up to the front door and rang the doorbell. Gabriel fell off the couch and onto the floor with a resounding crash. They heard footsteps coming towards the door accompanied by curses. He yanked open the door. When he saw who it was, he attempted to shut it in their face, but the three of them forced their way into his house.

"You're all dead!" He screeched, backing away from them and running back into the house. "DEAD!"

Sam and Dean looked at each other, and then at Cass. "Does Ipecac make you…you know…cuckoo?"

"Not that I know of."

They made their way into the living room, where Gabriel was on all fours, retching. The place was a mess, to say the least. The table was on its side, one leg broken. Cups and saucers littered the room. And the whole place was decorated artistically with vomit.

"Ew."

"What are you doing here?" Gabriel pushed himself up against the couch.

"We came to tell you that we're pulling out." Dean said, grimacing at the puddles of vomit on the floor. "This prank war is over. We're all even, and now we're not going to continue it. Okay?"

"Says who? This day was hell for me, and now I'll make every day hell for you!"

"No, you won't. Because I'm able to _read_ people. And you're an angel, and hence a douchebag, and that's fine! But I know you're not a killer. Or a maimer, in this case, anyway. Are you?"

Gabriel hung his head. "Fine, let's call a truce."

As a show of friendship, Castiel got the Ipecac out of Gabe's system and got the Barbie off his face. Sam and Dean helped clean up the place, though they did it reluctantly. Then they bid him goodbye, and Castiel and Gabriel flashed away. Dean and walked back to the car, ready to get out of this town and get back in the game.

"Wow, that was powerful," Sam said in a choked voice as they sat in the Impala.

"Yeah, my speech was awesome! Even though I've used it before, it sounded really fresh!"

"That's not what I meant…"

Dean shot him a questioning look.

"Uh, you kind of farted just now, and I nearly fainted…"

"Oh."

Dean steered the Impala out the driveway and onto the road, heading for the highway.

**Please review, even flames are welcome! :D**


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